I am having a bad day. These drugs have made my head incredibly foggy. As I write the things I see myself saying are incredibly trite; i.e. the inability to focus, the irritability, the lack of interest in anything for an extended period of time etc.
Right now I am struggling with telling people about my illness. I have so much pride that I am stuggling with who to tell and who not to tell. My major support system is church and I feel that if I tell them that I would be eliminated for any future leadership opportunities in church. I find this completely ironic considering that I would want to lead something in church considering that I can barely keep my apartment clean.
I'm not suicidal or anything, I just don't know my ass from my elbow these days. I think I need to see my p-med doctor again. I just saw him on Friday and he told me that I needed to come off the Topamax. So it will be the Pristiq and the Abilify only only. I am fighting Depakote/Lithiium as they weight gaining drugs and I so don't need to go there.
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